Every time I attempt to write a paper for class, I get so much motivation and so many good ideas… for everything but the paper. My brain is absolutely overflowing with creativity, things I want to do/try/make/invent/research, even write about. But exactly none of them are more than tangentially related to the assignment.
Why, dear universe, why?
Ah, so this is where you’ve been hiding, dear friend. My internets have been so empty without you, but as it turns out I just don’t check tumblr often enough.
Halfway between the old man who smiles knowingly at the young folk because he’s already made the mistake they’re about to,
and the little kid pedaling his trike down the sidewalk, screaming at the top of his lungs because he’s going so blinking fast!
Yep, that’s me. Not great at this whole “blogging regularly” thing. But what else is new, really. It’s spring break, so I remember and return to my long lost tumblr. As you do. But it’s not like anyone reads this anyway, so there’s no one to miss me… Good thing? Bad? Mildly depressing anyway.
On that note, I’ve been pondering loneliness a fair bit lately. Not that I’m lonely, per se. It’s more scattered moments of awareness, ironically rarely when I’m actually alone. Usually when my apartment’s full of people, even friends.
Or, for example, at a conference with a group from my church. Note, not the part where I’m by myself in a crowd of thousands. That, I’m perfectly content with. It was when our group was doing something together, and I’d notice I was the only one there who’s still in college (ironically at a conference targeted to students). Or better yet, the only one not engaged or married. Not even kidding. Another single girl showed up mid-weekend, but for a good bit of the time our group consisted of two couples, three guys whose ladies couldn’t make it, and me. And for a while another friend of mine came to visit… with her fiance. Haha. Now don’t get me wrong, they’re all great, and weren’t excluding me or anything, but once you notice that little fact, you can’t un-notice it. SPECIAL.
In cheerier news, it’s spring break, and since my sister started going to my school this year, we have the same spring break for the first time in a long time, and the last time I’ll have one. So my parents decided to take advantage of this fact, and we’re going on legit vacation! We’re going to Florida, and on a cruise to the Bahamas! I’ve spent a decent amount of time on boats of various sorts, but never overnight, nor one so consumer/tourist-oriented, so I’m psyched. The only downside is not getting my quality puppy time on this break, but at least my mom’s friend is dog- and house-sitting so he won’t be alone!
Also, I graduate in 63 days. Thank God.